Don't Demand

What You Need to Not Do

It is often much easier to react to a stressful situation than it is to respond in a thoughtful and loving manner. Unfortunately, reacting can do tremendous damage to a relationship. Frequently, this damage can be repaired; but it takes a lot of time and energy to fix something that needn't have been harmed in the first place. Take a moment to remind yourself of some things that should be guarded against as you question Mormonism with your loved-ones.

Do Not Be Afraid

Mormonism is not something to fear. It is a false belief system which can be exposed in the light of truth. Do not be afraid to confront it; it will not stand against honest investigation. Have the courage to tackle tough questions and difficult issues which may arise as you question Mormonism. Not only do these answers help your loved-ones, they also strengthen and clarify your own faith.

Do Not Attack or Belittle

As you learn more about Mormonism, it may begin to feel like you've built up quite an arsenal of ammunition to use against your LDS friends. It may require real self-control to keep from dumping all of your information on them at once. Questioning Mormonism is a sensitive affair which requires tenderness and compassion. You must avoid all appearance of attacking your friends' faith or belittling LDS beliefs. Though you may not agree with the doctrines your LDS friends embrace, it is very important to honor your friends with respect.

Do Not Deliver Ultimatums

While it might seem like a good idea in the heat of the moment--a desperate attempt to shock your loved-one to his or her senses--ultimatums build walls rather than bridges. It is imperative that you keep a solid and open relationship with those you are trying to reach. The idea is to work with them to help them see what you see. Forcing them to make a decision they are not ready to make will not open their eyes; it will shut their hearts to you and all you have to offer them.

Do Not Get Angry

We have all experienced the truth of the Proverb: "A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger." (15:1)

Anger does not help the situation with your LDS friend, it only serves to complicate matters. Talking with Latter-day Saints or investigators who have become devoted to the LDS Church system can be highly frustrating at times; nevertheless, the attitude which will touch them most deeply is one of quiet and calm confidence.

Perhaps it is good to keep foremost in mind this direction from the New Testament book of 2 Timothy:

"And the Lord's bondservant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth..." (2:24-25)

This is our prayer for you. May God go with you as you seek to bring your loved-ones knowledge of the truth.

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